Signing Time Downloads/DVD's (get a free movie download too)
EXAMPLE OF PECS BOARD
Example of PECS Schedule Board
Shepherding A Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp
Saturday, April 14, 2012
Communicating with my children
Both of my girls and Nathan have been speech delayed. MJ is very verbal now and Lydia is picking up words. While they were/are struggling with speech, we found alternative ways to communicate. The first was "Baby Signs" but then I quickly moved to traditional American Sign Language (ASL) so as to use a real language and not risk offending someone with made up signs. I took an ASL class in college and wish I would've have continued in taking more classes. However, I found a great resource at the library and at the time it was also on public television. It was the DVD series called Signing Time!. MJ especially loved the shows and rapidly increased her vocabulary both in sign and in speech. She still watches them to this day.
Lydia also loves watching Signing Time and I believe it has helped her receptive language a lot. The preschool in Utah found that Lydia does better with the Picture Exchange Communication System (PECS) for expressive language. This system uses pictures with words on cards and boards with velcro on them to create sentences with the pictures. The teacher or adult hands the child the picture cards and whatever they are trying to communicate, that card is given back to the teacher or placed on the board. For example, "Lydia, would you like milk or juice?". The milk and juice cards are handed to Lydia and she gives back the card for whichever choice she made. In this case, Lydia handed back the milk card as her choice.
It was hard for me to accept that Lydia did better with PECS and to implement it in our home because it's just plain inconvenient to carry all those cards and PECS book. I finally gave in though and the school made a PECS book for home and helped with a PECS Schedule board also. The PECs Schedule board helps the children know what to expect during their routines of the day. MJ and Lydia both love schedule boards and it helps them especially for school.
I am using ASL with Nathan too. He has picked up some and we are watching the Baby Signing Time series made by the same company that created Signing Time.
MJ seems to have a lot of meltdowns when she feels misunderstood. One of the autism specialists mentioned that MJ feels everyone can read her mind and know what she's doing/wants. I hadn't ever thought of that before. Whenever meltdowns happen, I found out that if I ask MJ what is going on and how can I help vs. disciplining for the outburst, that it's usually a simple fix. If it isn't then I repeat MJ's request and tell her I understand how she feels but we cannot do her request and then state the reason as simply as possible. She's usually very reasonable after knowing that she's been listened to, understood, her feelings cared about and that she is loved. If discipline is given as the first response, it hurts MJ and she acts out even worse because she feels unloved and not heard. She thinks people are just being mean and ugly to her for no reason. I've noticed this is the case with a lot of children with autism.
It takes a lot of effort to get to the heart of the issue vs. disciplining outward behavior, even with typical children. One book that was given to us that has helped me understand this is Shepherding a Child's Heart by Ted Tripp. It talks about the root of the behavior verses the behavior itself. Pharisees are created when just outward behavior is addressed verses addressing the heart of the issue. I've seen very respectful and behaved children/teenagers/adults to their elders/authority but underneath that they have wicked hearts. I'd much rather have honest children who know it's ok to be themselves with me and with God too. That means that I better be prepared for the truth too and be gracious no matter what that might be and prayerful to God to ask the best way to handle the situation. It seems that the Mr./Ms. Innocents are the ones that get into the most trouble. Simply because they've mastered the art of outward appearances and the parents didn't take the time to dig deeper and pour into their lives. I pray everyday that I can be a shepherd vs. a Pharisee. That takes communication, the art of listening and speaking, a give AND a take, in a meaningful conversation. Not merely a lecture or punishment.
Lydia also loves watching Signing Time and I believe it has helped her receptive language a lot. The preschool in Utah found that Lydia does better with the Picture Exchange Communication System (PECS) for expressive language. This system uses pictures with words on cards and boards with velcro on them to create sentences with the pictures. The teacher or adult hands the child the picture cards and whatever they are trying to communicate, that card is given back to the teacher or placed on the board. For example, "Lydia, would you like milk or juice?". The milk and juice cards are handed to Lydia and she gives back the card for whichever choice she made. In this case, Lydia handed back the milk card as her choice.
It was hard for me to accept that Lydia did better with PECS and to implement it in our home because it's just plain inconvenient to carry all those cards and PECS book. I finally gave in though and the school made a PECS book for home and helped with a PECS Schedule board also. The PECs Schedule board helps the children know what to expect during their routines of the day. MJ and Lydia both love schedule boards and it helps them especially for school.
I am using ASL with Nathan too. He has picked up some and we are watching the Baby Signing Time series made by the same company that created Signing Time.
MJ seems to have a lot of meltdowns when she feels misunderstood. One of the autism specialists mentioned that MJ feels everyone can read her mind and know what she's doing/wants. I hadn't ever thought of that before. Whenever meltdowns happen, I found out that if I ask MJ what is going on and how can I help vs. disciplining for the outburst, that it's usually a simple fix. If it isn't then I repeat MJ's request and tell her I understand how she feels but we cannot do her request and then state the reason as simply as possible. She's usually very reasonable after knowing that she's been listened to, understood, her feelings cared about and that she is loved. If discipline is given as the first response, it hurts MJ and she acts out even worse because she feels unloved and not heard. She thinks people are just being mean and ugly to her for no reason. I've noticed this is the case with a lot of children with autism.
It takes a lot of effort to get to the heart of the issue vs. disciplining outward behavior, even with typical children. One book that was given to us that has helped me understand this is Shepherding a Child's Heart by Ted Tripp. It talks about the root of the behavior verses the behavior itself. Pharisees are created when just outward behavior is addressed verses addressing the heart of the issue. I've seen very respectful and behaved children/teenagers/adults to their elders/authority but underneath that they have wicked hearts. I'd much rather have honest children who know it's ok to be themselves with me and with God too. That means that I better be prepared for the truth too and be gracious no matter what that might be and prayerful to God to ask the best way to handle the situation. It seems that the Mr./Ms. Innocents are the ones that get into the most trouble. Simply because they've mastered the art of outward appearances and the parents didn't take the time to dig deeper and pour into their lives. I pray everyday that I can be a shepherd vs. a Pharisee. That takes communication, the art of listening and speaking, a give AND a take, in a meaningful conversation. Not merely a lecture or punishment.
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Today's resources
Bible References
Jesus in the home of a leper. Mathew 26:6
Jesus recounts those who have been healed Matthew 11:5
The command to heal those who are sick Matthew 10:8
10 Lepers healed Luke 17:10-12
The Good News EVERYONE needs to know! John 3:16, 1 John 3:1, 1 John 3:16
Our home church Christian Life Church (Assembly)
Contact Pastor Frank Trezoglou regarding the Special Needs children's ministry Hands and Feet.
Lepers of today and Jesus
Just a little of our family background to set the context of this. I became a Christian at at the age of 20 and came from a non-Christian background. I moved at the age of 22 to the Bible Belt very specifically to grow in my relationship with Jesus and to learn from seasoned Christians. I was able to also attend Bible College and graduated with a Bachelors in Bible and Communications. My husband and I met at a single's Bible study at church. My husband has been around Christianity his whole life. All this to say that Jesus is a very important person in my life and His family, my family.After college, my husband moved our family out west to a state that challenges Christian marriages and families in general, let alone those with special needs family members. I never ever would have imagined not being able to attend church and fellowship with other believers in America.
As my children with autism got older, they became harder to manage at church. We experienced the same things most special needs families do. We got kicked out of church, much like the lepers were kicked out of synagogues and cities. We were told over and over again "we are not equipped", as if that would explain it away. We always came back with "let's get equipped and we'll help you." We were sent away time and again. Once we were told "we have all these people to lead to God and you're in the way".
We were living out west in a state that doesn't have a lot of Christian churches anyway, so we started having car church, where we would go for a drive, listen to praise and worship music, pray, read the Bible and listen to a sermon from our home church. We tried church after church, one advertised a special needs ministry. We came to find out it was one military couple volunteering to babysit during church and whenever they couldn't do it, we were told we couldn't come to church. The church and the couple refused to read even a 2 minute Bible story to the kids in the SUNDAY SCHOOL class. All other kids were learning about Jesus in the building and classes all around them, NOT my kids. This became unacceptable to us, we approached the church to see what we could do to help. We then were asked to leave. Other churches said we were welcomed as long as we stayed with the kids in their classrooms. Car or home church was easier on us but we lacked fellowship.
Throughout all this I kept Jesus as the center of our home and struggled (still struggling) to forgive those who dismissed us so easily as not important enough to bring into God's family. I prayed to go back to the Bible Belt and our home church because I knew they would make a way.
God answered my prayers last year. Not in the way, I hoped, as our family is now split. The kids and I are back home and our church family has bent over backwards helping us. They got equipped and now have a special needs MINISTRY and the kids are learning about Jesus from the Bible, worshiping, praying and even dancing before His throne!
As I've visited other churches with Special Needs classes, I've noticed that most are simply babysitting the kids and not actively teaching the kids about Jesus or reading them the Bible. This evangelist and Bible College grad could not accept this for my children. It takes a village to raise a child. It takes 3 villages to raise a special needs child and very purposefully doing all we can to truly give the child wings! This includes teaching about Jesus. I am so very very thankful for my home church for being our family and our villages.
The miracles in the Bible that we read are all healing of special needs people. The ones kicked out of the churches who Jesus went to personally, healed them and shared the good news with them! The church that wants to see revival and miracles is the one that ministers to special needs people because Jesus came to save the ones who are sick not the ones who are well. The Remnant is made up of churches rolling up our sleeves, literally getting dirty and deep into ministry to special needs people of all types. The highest calling is do to do the lowliest duty of preaching Jesus while changing diapers of all ages. The pastor/person that can serve a special needs person in any capacity is the one that will see the miracles and revival happen.
Bible references
Jesus in the home of a leper. Mathew 26:6
Jesus recounts those who have been healed Matthew 11:5
The command to heal those who are sick Matthew 10:8
10 Lepers healed Luke 17:10-12
As my children with autism got older, they became harder to manage at church. We experienced the same things most special needs families do. We got kicked out of church, much like the lepers were kicked out of synagogues and cities. We were told over and over again "we are not equipped", as if that would explain it away. We always came back with "let's get equipped and we'll help you." We were sent away time and again. Once we were told "we have all these people to lead to God and you're in the way".
We were living out west in a state that doesn't have a lot of Christian churches anyway, so we started having car church, where we would go for a drive, listen to praise and worship music, pray, read the Bible and listen to a sermon from our home church. We tried church after church, one advertised a special needs ministry. We came to find out it was one military couple volunteering to babysit during church and whenever they couldn't do it, we were told we couldn't come to church. The church and the couple refused to read even a 2 minute Bible story to the kids in the SUNDAY SCHOOL class. All other kids were learning about Jesus in the building and classes all around them, NOT my kids. This became unacceptable to us, we approached the church to see what we could do to help. We then were asked to leave. Other churches said we were welcomed as long as we stayed with the kids in their classrooms. Car or home church was easier on us but we lacked fellowship.
Throughout all this I kept Jesus as the center of our home and struggled (still struggling) to forgive those who dismissed us so easily as not important enough to bring into God's family. I prayed to go back to the Bible Belt and our home church because I knew they would make a way.
God answered my prayers last year. Not in the way, I hoped, as our family is now split. The kids and I are back home and our church family has bent over backwards helping us. They got equipped and now have a special needs MINISTRY and the kids are learning about Jesus from the Bible, worshiping, praying and even dancing before His throne!
As I've visited other churches with Special Needs classes, I've noticed that most are simply babysitting the kids and not actively teaching the kids about Jesus or reading them the Bible. This evangelist and Bible College grad could not accept this for my children. It takes a village to raise a child. It takes 3 villages to raise a special needs child and very purposefully doing all we can to truly give the child wings! This includes teaching about Jesus. I am so very very thankful for my home church for being our family and our villages.
The miracles in the Bible that we read are all healing of special needs people. The ones kicked out of the churches who Jesus went to personally, healed them and shared the good news with them! The church that wants to see revival and miracles is the one that ministers to special needs people because Jesus came to save the ones who are sick not the ones who are well. The Remnant is made up of churches rolling up our sleeves, literally getting dirty and deep into ministry to special needs people of all types. The highest calling is do to do the lowliest duty of preaching Jesus while changing diapers of all ages. The pastor/person that can serve a special needs person in any capacity is the one that will see the miracles and revival happen.
Bible references
Jesus in the home of a leper. Mathew 26:6
Jesus recounts those who have been healed Matthew 11:5
The command to heal those who are sick Matthew 10:8
10 Lepers healed Luke 17:10-12
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